VALUE-BASED SEXUAL EXPRESSION MANUAL 'FACTS OF LIFE'
The manual was written in order to provide resource for parents, guardians and teachers approaching the sensitive and godly task of teaching youth about the Facts of Life.
VALUE-BASED SEXUAL EXPRESSION MANUAL 'FACTS OF LIFE' PART THREE
9. Education
Parents, guardians and educators will find personal prayer helpful in approaching life education.
Becoming a prayerful guide assists in the task of going about making a positive difference in the youth’s future.
At every stage of their lives, youth will benefit from our prayers.
The key to giving effective life education is not by trying to carry the task out by ourselves, but rather by turning for help to the expert parent of all time – our Father God.
The Great Parent will assist prayerful guides with inspiration to carry out this responsible task effectively.
10. Life Education for Youth Resource for the Educator
Marriage
According to the Plan of God, sex is meant for marriage.
Marriage is meant to be a permanent commitment.
A couple in love look forward to a happy future together.
The reality requires however that they first discuss a number of issues before they take the big step of marriage.
When a couple marry, their entire lives change.
It is important that the engaged couple discuss important issues together in order to prevent difficulties later.
Important Questions for Discussion include;
Facts of Life;
Knowledge about the facts of life is essential for a successful marriage.
In the past some entered the state of marriage without full knowledge of the sexual implications. This led to difficulties within the marriage until appropriate information about procreation was received; upon which anxieties and difficulties were resolved.
Belief
Personal relationship with God has influence on the manner in which the individual approaches life and takes decisions.
A couple with different beliefs need to take into account their personal belief and the effect it will have on their planned marriage.
Questions may arise about the religious upbringing of the child and whether the family will be able to worship together.
A family which is able to attend communal worship together will be strengthened in its spiritual bonds, and supported by the community. Again, ‘the family that prays together stays together’
The Past
Past heartaches and old tragedies have influence on relationships; and often on the person most closely connected with one.
Future marriage partners need to discuss unresolved questions from their past with one another.
Openness and honesty are important components in a strong marriage.
Children
Being a parent is a serious responsibility.
Children have a big impact on a marriage and the parents’ finances.
This is an area which is fraught with implications and the questions of how both parents will share their financial responsibilities in their joint future should not be left undiscussed during the engagement.
Financial dishonesty and uncertainty can give rise to much humiliation and unpleasantness in families.
It is important for the engaged couple to discuss their views on the children that may be born to the marriage.
Each child born to a couple should be kept safe during pregnancy.
Abortion is unacceptable in God’s Law. The couple need to discuss how they see their future role as parent, and what to expect from the partner’s role in the forthcoming marriage.
If one partner wants to have children, and the other does not, this needs to be discussed before the marriage in order to prevent future marital problems.
If one partner wishes future children to be educated exclusively at boarding school, while the other wishes that the children remain part of the secure family unit while commuting to a day school, familial difficulties can result.
Prior discussion about the plan for the raising of the children is essential.
Future Plans
Do not assume that your fiancé understands your plans and dreams for future if you have not discussed these.
If one partner goes into a marriage expecting to be given the freedom of long periods of absence from home in order to pursue a career, this needs to be discussed beforehand with the other.
Many marriages have been placed under unbearable tension when surprises have been sprung on the partner shortly after the wedding vows have been made.
The time to discuss issues is before the commitment, in order to prevent future conflict which could weaken the marriage.
Money
Life is expensive, and married life more so. Once again, remember to discuss your finances during the engagement.
Many marriages have been weakened by irresponsible handling of finances by one or both marriage partners.
Discuss whether you will be married within community of property or by antenuptial agreement.
Discuss any debts you may have, and how you will budget within your lives together.
Work out how you will plan for large financial decisions, such as a mortgage.
If one partner wants to buy a house while the other one does not, discuss the issue prior to the wedding.
It is a fact that some couples want a large wedding and a luxurious honeymoon which may be outside the scope of their finances.
At times a newly wedded couple may come back from honeymoon to a morass of debt.
An alternative is to save the money which would be spent on a large wedding, and choose a small celebration instead.
Many couples never again meet the majority of the people who attended their wedding and whom at the time of the event they felt they could not possibly exclude from their list of invitations.
This is fine for wealthy people but very sad for those who may be struggling financially.
The money saved by having a modest celebration could make a great difference to a new couple starting married life together.
House Chores
The order in which house chores will be done should be discussed.
If both partners work at a tiring career, it could cause difficulties in a marriage if one partner were then to be expected by the other to perform all the house chores because of the individual’s gender. Many women help their men with painting and the garden, while men can help with the dishes or with bathing the baby without loss of their masculinity. Work out ahead of time what role your spouse will expect you to play in household chores; how you will purchase necessities and the financial means you will use as payment.
Be aware how current and savings accounts work, plan for a pension upon retirement and save a nest egg for a rainy day.
If one partner’s idea of a family meal is to leave the future spouse and children at home while personally favouring a liquid lunch and dinner, trouble will loom.
Likewise, if one partner expects the other to cook a home meal after the latter has just completed a twelve hour workday with two hours commute either way - while the first has been at home all day off work - controversy tends to be the norm.
A good assessment of the roles each expects of the other within the future marriage with regard to tasks such as the following, will clarify the expectations of each for the other.
The tasks include;
Cooking
Cleaning
Organisation of bin payments and collection
Car wash and maintenance
Purchase of supplies
Payment of bills
Arguments
Discuss how you propose to handle differences in your marriage.
Drawing up a list of rules which both of you will refer to is helpful.
The main rule – as many a successfully married couple with many years of marriage behind them often say – is never to mention divorce.
If divorce remains the unspeakable word, the road for communication may remain open.
If a partner goes in to a marriage with a settlement left with their attorney in case they decide on a future divorce, the marriage is not getting the best start it could.
11. Difference between Love and Lust
Love is a joyful feeling of connection with another that wishes only the best for the other person.
A loving relationship includes expressions of affection, both physical and emotional.
Love wishes to offer pleasure, stability and satisfaction to another.
Love wishes to cause no harm, is not jealous, and puts the needs of the other before one’s own.
Love is, in essence, unselfish.
Love is characterised by tenderness, compassion and sensitivity to the needs of the other.
There is a desire for shared activities and pursuits, an honest ongoing exchange of personal feelings.
Love is the ongoing process of offering concern, comfort and outward assistance for the loved one’s aspirations.
Love with sexuality such as is expressed in marriage, uses the sexual gift to bring happiness and fulfilment to the other.
Unselfishness and morality are the hallmarks of sex in loving relationship.
Lust is sexual feeling which is not concerned with the good of the other.
Lust does not wish to offer stability, compassion or joy to the other.
Lust is concerned with personal gratification, albeit at the expense of the other person.
Lust also is not faithful. Gratification of sexual instinct is the main goal, with no thought or concern as to the repercussions or results such activity may cause in another.
The expression of true love, with sexual expression forming part of that union, is the blueprint of the original Plan God had in mind for humanity.
Blog posts;
Value-based sexual expression manual 'facts of life' Part One
http://churchinterfaith.blogspot.ie/2016/07/value-based-sexual-expression-manual.html
Value-based sexual expression manual 'Facts of Life' Part Two
http://churchinterfaith.blogspot.ie/2016/07/value-based-sexual-expression-manual_88.html
BOOKLET "VALUE-BASED SEXUAL EXPRESSION 'FACTS OF LIFE' " AVAILABLE IN FOLLOWING LINK;
https://drive.google.com/open?id=0B_JEo1vAsAPsdGJxUE1mdVRBdUk
Disclaimer; The information contained in the 'Facts of Life' blog posts is not meant to replace your Doctor or Health Professional Care
The booklet is for use copyright free, for any worthy purpose
No comments:
Post a Comment